vision

one of the biggest ways that i have grown this year is in my ability to vision. let me be clear here, i have always been a visionary. the thing about how i vision, though, is that i'm a dreamer. i dream big, i have big hopes, i like to imagine the greatest possibility. maybe this is more idealist than visionary. what i am learning this year is to vision realistically. to take these big dreams that i have and to figure out how they fit into everyday life. to evaluate where i have been, the mistakes i have made and to see what needs to be changed, flexed, tweaked so that i can move forward. i have had the opportunity to do this in my own personal life, as well as in making decisions that affect groups of people. never before have i been in such a position as to be accountable for the longterm effects of my dreams, and what works and what doesn't about them. in the past i have been a part of streamlining and making systems more efficient, particularly in the day-to-day operations of banking, but how do you do this when it comes to people, relationships, community? the rules are definitely not the same. i have been the person who has a big dream, leaps with all my might for the stars, and settles into something comfortable when that epically fails - for a little while, until my next big dream comes along. this year i have learned how to have a dream, make a plan, take a step, evaluate and keep moving. sometimes this involves pushing through something that is difficult in order to find out what works and what doesn't. sometimes i have resorted back to my pattern of retreat when things didn't go as planned. but still i get to dream. i'm learning not just to dream big, but to dream well.